My immortal
by AngelKruger
Summary: The time comes to let go. Can anyone guess the pairing?


_Hey there, I'm baaaaack!!! Sorry for pulling the disappearing act on you but life really got hectic, you know, work and all that stuff and then I got really sick and had to go to the hospital... EVERY FREAKING DAY!!! But here's my latest fic, I'm working on a longer fic but 'till then, I hope you enjoy this, it's a short one but the idea just hit me while listening to this beautiful song, thanx._

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Mai HiME (but I sure wish I owned Nao), nor do I own the song "My immortal" by Evanescence.

_As always, this is for you guys and specially for **ALEXISSA2**._

_Oh, and by the way, lots of cookies and sunshine to whoever guesses the pairing, drop me your guess in a review!_

_And sorry 'bout any mistakes u find, i don't have a beta and this whas written just in the spur of the moment, so again, my apologies._

_**MY IMMORTAL**_

I don't know how long I've been sitting here looking at the sea and quite frankly, I don't care, I find peace just sitting here with no one else but me, the sea, the stars and my memories.

Today is the seventh anniversary that I met you, we were supposed to meet here and celebrate the day that we found each other, the day that I will always remember as the day that I found the piece that was missing in my life, the day that I found my most important person, but again I waited for you for hours even though I knew that you would be with him... Always with him.

I'm tired of living like t his, and believe me when I say that I've tried to let go of you, but every time that I finally gather the strength to do it, you come back and hug me making it hard for me to completely let go.

I'm afraid, afraid of being alone again, afraid that if I let go, I will loose myself in your memories, I know I'm pathetic, but it's just too hard.

_**I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone**_

I take another drink of my bottle of whiskey, my other loyal friend, I don't usually drink but every year on this date, the only thing that I want is to drown the memories and the pain... I wish I could just drink you away.

I know this is wrong, is killing me, you've hurt me so much and yet I always hope that you will just appear with a smile in your beautiful face, that smile that I adore so much.

Sometimes I even wish I could erase all the memories, all the pain, all this wounds that you inflicted in my heart. They say that time heals everything, but I'm still waiting.

_**These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase**_

Memories... Thats all I have left.

I remember finding you crying in the middle of the night and how I always cradled you in my arms, whispering words of comfort in your hear, telling you once and again that as long as I was with you, you would never have to fight the ghosts of the past alone.

I also remember holding your hand when you felt scared to confront the world and the people again, lending you my strength every step of the way.

I remember telling you once and again how much I loved you, and how happy I felt when you finally said it back.

_**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years**_

And I also remember turning my back to my own blood, giving my life to save your soul...

_**But you still have  
All of me**_

Your soul, the only thing that I will always love so much.

Since the first time that I saw you I fell in love with you, with the light that your smile always brought to my life, the fire burning fiercely behind your kind eyes, your voice that used to call my name with a sweetness that I didn't knew before, the touch of your hands that always left me wanting more.

I loved all those things, but thats exactly the problem, the fact that those are the tings that wont let me break free of you, 'cause you moved on, but refused to let go of me.

_**You used to captivate me  
By your resonating light  
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind**_

There's times at night when I'm asleep, that your image will pop up in my mind, taking away the only time when I can stop consciously thinking about you, taking the only bit of peace that my mind gives me.

I see you holding me tight in your arms, calling my name once and again like you used to, but when I open my eyes you're not there.

Sometimes even during the day I can hear your voice calling my name, but every time I turn around I only find the same emptiness that has been my constant companion since I lost you to him.

Sometimes I call someone else by your name, people is starting to think that I'm crazy, but I don't really care, only those who know who you are smile sadly at me and say 'I'm sorry, but I'm not her'.

_**Your face it haunts  
My once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away  
All the sanity in me**_

I've prayed to God endless times to help me, to show me the way to erase you from my mind and my heart, to give me the strength to say 'no more', but only I know the answer to my questions.

I've been trying for so long to let go of you, but tonight I realized that it's you who didn't want to let go of me, I'm not the one that is afraid of taking my own path, you're the one that is still clinging to our long gone days together, 'cause I've tried and if it wasn't for you always coming back I would have succeeded a long time ago.

Because I know that you're already out of my reach, but you're shadow still follows me around like I used to follow you, I know that when I get home you will be there waiting for me, 'cause you're always there willing me to comeback to you, but it's over for me, and now is your turn to understand that... To accept it and respect my decision.

_**I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me  
I've been alone all along**_

'Cause know I know that even though you've been by my side all this time, I've been alone all along...

**FIN**

**Thanx to everyone for taking 5 minutes of your time to read this, I really appreciate it, but I have one last request for all of you, please give a couple of minutes more and drop me a review, I promise it won't hurt a bit ; )**


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